Merry Christmas

Here's our holiday card this year, cuteness of Collin included. Laying these out is one of my favorite past times. I've just started to work on the birth announcement, so as soon as the little guy is here I'll post that as well.

Motherhood

We're only a few weeks from expecting our newest addition and I feel like I've missed so many opportunities to post about him, our journey through this pregnancy and life as we've taken each week in stride, so I'm trying to make up for it here with a post filled with all things pregnancy...

Now, at 36 weeks, I'm feeling more and more ready to deliver physically. Its hard to bend over, hard to pick up Collin, hard to breathe...you get the idea. But in the real world, outside of my belly, I'm not exactly ready yet. The nursery isn't ready, the car seat isn't installed, the freezer meals aren't made...I've got a little list and I'm plugging away hoping that this little guy doesn't show up early so I can feel like I'm able to relax when he finally does make his grand appearance.

This pregnancy, as I've written about before, is quite a bit different than when I was pregnant with Collin, but maybe most clearly different in that we've already made not one, but two trips to the hospital for baby Hollman, as he's decided to exert his independence and prompt some panic in mommy and daddy through some unexpected contractions and periodic spotting. As it turns out though (thus far) all trips to the hospital have resulted in nada- just being monitored and sent back home with a drug of choice (to stop contractions) on occasion. I think that these trips to the Labor and Delivery floor have prompted a bit of additional relaxation in me though, which may be good or bad. Because we've been given a clean bill of health twice after these episodes I've come to think that nearly everything that might be concerning to a first time mom is no big deal. Irregular contractions- nothing to worry about, a little light spotting- nothing you can't deal with in the morning, tremendous back pain- unlikely labor, grin and bear it...etc.

As we settle into the last month (less than 30 days!) I'm struck by how excited and anxious I am to meet and hold baby Hollman. I dream about savoring whole days where I can just admire and hold him (which is far, far from what reality will be, I'm sure), but I'm already in awe of how much of a miracle babies are. Maybe its the Christmas season or maybe its my hormones, but I can't help having a feeling of entire completeness as we continue to add to our family.

A few weeks back we met with Jenn, our photographer to do a photoshoot for Christmas Cards and maternity photos. I'm glad we did these again this time. I contemplated just using the Christmas photos as evidence of my pregnancy, but the photos (at least to me) help illustrate a connection between us (me and the baby that is) that isn't captured when others are around. A combination of anxiousness and contentedness that Jenn can capture in a way we can't on our own.

Along the way I've been crafting like a mad lady (when I have time that is, and when I'm not going crazy nesting), making curtains, making boppy covers (in which I installed my first zipper- which was much easier than I thought it would be!), and finishing the afghan. Next up on the craft docket is the quilt, but I have no plans of even getting started until I'm imminently close to labor, so I don't plan to have it finished until summer or so :)

The nursery is almost done, a few photos to hang, the crib bedding to put in and some baskets left to purchase, but generally we are making our way to being ready for a baby. I'll post some photos soon of all the crafts I've done to greet baby Hollman and completed shots of the nursery.

These last few weeks are full of butterfly-like anticipation for meeting baby Hollman. I wonder if he'll look like Collin did, if the labor will be quick or long, easy or painful, if he'll adapt well to his big brother....Mostly though, I am anxious to have him in my arms.

This pregnancy, even through all the ups and downs, has been another wonder in our lives. Every muscle cramp, tired night, aching limb, and nauseating wave will be well worth it when our little bundle of adorable Hollman & Wackerle genes arrives. We can't wait to meet you baby Hollman (just hang on for a few more weeks and we'll be all set!).

18 months

Dear Collin-

Its hard to believe you are a year and a half old. But, isn't that how I start all of these posts? You're milestones are incredible to watch these days, and I can barely contain my excitement as I watch you take larger leaps into the world around you.

These days we start your mornings around 7:30 or 8 am, when I hear you talking to yourself in your crib. You spend 15 or so minutes talking to Benny the bear, just a bit of small talk I think, before greeting the world head on. You still enjoy time in your crib, and rarely ever cry, instead you greet us with a bright "Hi!" when you're ready to escape the four walls that keep you safe and sound throughout the night.
Once you're awake and ready to head out among your toys, I temporarily way-lay you to your highchair for breakfast. These days you love waffles and cream of wheat with applesauce, fruit, yogurt and milk, but spend lots of time conversing, playing with the dog or other entertaining trinkets you can get your hands on -- cookie cutters, crayons, magnets from the fridge -- whatever is available, in your reach and more fun than the fork in front of your. So, some mornings you have a hearty breakfast and talk to me about animals and songs, while others you pick like a little bird and request unlimited renditions of the wheels on the bus, the itsy bitsy spider, if you're happy and you know it and little bunny foo-foo. After breakfast we clean you up and get you dressed for a full day of toys, activities, naps, meals and new adventures.
You're an incredibly laid back toddler, who seems to take everything is stride. You don't get upset when kids take toys from you (in fact I think soon we'll have to work on being a bit more assertive), you love to share and always are will to play wiht others at school and when we're with friends. You're little life glows to me like one giant happy smile, as I can't help but look at you and feel my heart overflow with love.

As you land somewhere in the pile of your toys in your room,likely between the click-clack alligator and Little People barnyard, we sit to play and read for a bit before I head off to work. This is one of my most favorite times of day, as I get to enjoy playing with you, just the two of us, settled into a world of imagination purely created from your funiest thoughts and silliest actions.
You've taken to handing out lots of love lately, spontaneous kisses and hugs, that I really can't get enough of. It's amazing to see how you climb into my arms, even around the basketball that saddles my waist and come ever so closely to nuzzle into me for an eskimo kiss. Within the same moment you'll lean away, come back and say "hug", which is so absolutely adorable you could follow up my smashing something valuable and I'd proabably still have a smile plastered on my face.
A handful of times, while getting ready for bed and nearly being asleep in the rocking chair you've raised your little head, planted on kiss on my lips, and quietly snuggled back into sleep, as if you couldn't bear to not let me know one more time that you love us, particularly me, when snuggling to go to sleep.

Once we've been able to play for awhile, and I've set up your schedule for the day your nanny comes and you continue to play with her until its snack time, and then nap. You're naps lately have been fantastic, as you still appear to be totally my soon in the realm of sleeping, taking 3 to 4 hour naps daily. Its a precious time for us, as we prepare for the baby, and I look forward to your happiness and alertness when you awake with yet another bright smile.

After nap, daddy is home, ready to present you with another dog and pony show to get you to eat some lunch. Its typical, they say, at 18 months, for kids to be so distracted they just don't eat much, but we try our best to get you to take some sustenance in. Sometimes its more songs, sometimes its taking a break to color, sometimes its a game of fetch (daddy fetches, that is), and sometimes we just let it go and hope that you'll eat when you are hungry. Nevertheless, I worry that you don't get enough to eat and continue to hope you'll grow out of this phase soon.

By the time you are done with your late lunch you usually, if its nice, have time to play outside, or go to the park before I get home, so you and daddy play, either at home or away. You love spending time with daddy, and often the first person you ask for when you say "hi" in your crib is daddy. This melts my heart to know you have such a fantastic and strong relationship with him, as not all dads play such a close roll to their son's hearts at such a young age. Now that its winter, I'm sure you'll start spending some of that time heading to the snow hill at Parkview to sled down before it gets dark, or taking the dog for short walks in your burley, where you can stay nice and warm.

Later in the day, I arrive home, anxious to see you, as there isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss you at some point throughout the day. You always greet me with such a big "hi momma!" and generally run to hug and kiss me if the toy/crayon/playdough piece you have isn't totally engaging you. We get some time to play before dinner and usually find ourselves enteraining the puppy or doing puzzles while one of us (mommy or daddy) fixes dinner for you. Before we know it the day is coming to a close, you eating dinner near 6 oclock, soon followed by bath and bedtime at 7. Your routine has worked well for our family, making you a happy baby, as you sleep well and awake rested and a perfect compromise of time with both mommy and daddy. We're incredibly fortunate to have jobs that allow for such flexibility to spend so much time with you.

At 18 months,while your routine is fairly typical, your personal achievements are anything but. You're such a silly little ham, who loves to turn on the charm for the ladies. You blow kisses often, and your vocabulary is exploding, you have at least 100 words now- probably more, as you label everything you can. You're exploring cause and effect now in more complex ways and have made leaps and strides in fine motor tasks like coloring with crayons and playing with playdough. You love being outside and clearly recognize the differnce in many oposites, hot and cold, up and down (this may be your favorite), on and off, and the list goes on. You now clearly recognize people, gram and gramps, nana and papa, and turn on the bashful face for those you don't.

As we approach the arrival of your baby brother we're trying to prepare you for the enormous changes in your life, but I really don't know how possible that is considering you're meerly 18 months olds. You love babies though, and don't get jealous when I hold other infants. You like to put the ECFE babies to bed and tuck them into the stroller for a ride, which is so very precious. We think you'll be a very helpful big brother, and hope that some of your many generous kisses and hugs rub off on the newest baby Hollman when he makes his appearance.

Its hard to believe we've come so far so quickly, and how quickly we feel like we've forgotten what it was like to have a newborn. I think we're a bit aprehensive it our aniticipation of the new baby because you've grown up so fast. I wonder often, we're you ever that small? when I fold and put away the clothes for the new baby.

So, my dear sweet Collin, we are so incredibly delighted in who you are, your personality, your genuine love of life and your persistent smile and extended happiness. I couldn't image feeling this fufilled just 2 years ago, but here we are and my heart feels like it will literally burst with love for you.

We love you, incredibly so, and look forward to the next 18 months of this portion of toddlerhood as your doting parents.

Love,
Momma and Daddy

Holiday Season Photos

Snow!

Believe it or not, we've had our first winter storm of the year! On Saturday we were saddled with about a foot of wet, big flake, get your hot cocoa mug out snow. We weren't exactly prepared for it, as we hadn't yet put away all of our outdoor toys- the sandbox toys are still in the sandbox, and poor Samson's blankets that he usually sleeps on when basking in the sun outside are now swamped in a sparkly white layer of snow. Even though we'll have to dig through the snow to finally put away all of our fall stuff, we enjoyed the snow as it came down, as it finally put me in the mood for the holiday and began to feel like winter here. In fact, the snow as actually kind of fantastic, as we hunkered down, grabbed our warmest, coziest pairs clothes, and settled in for a day of warm food, cuddling and slow, lazy naps.


After Collin woke up from his nap we decided to bundle him up for his first real experience in the snow. Last year he was about 6 months old, so not quite old enough to understand the whole snow thing, and not quite old enough to appreciate all the fun to be had with snow balls, sleds and stomping around in boots. We took Collin out, fully dressed from head to toe in winter gear: snow pants, boots, a big poofy layered winter jacket, fuzzy fleece hat, mittens for making snowballs, and a big smile on his face. Once we got outside and we plopped Collin down in the snow he stood there a bit unstable. Since it was his first time trying to traverse in his boots he was a bit ambivalent and had a hard time walking around. He fell down, sort of in slow motion form, like watching a tiny little little bobble-head down topple over. Once he recovered from his fall, Drew showed him how Samson likes to chase and tries to eat snowballs, which Collin found hilarious. Soon after he was anxious to see what the snow was all about and asked to go down the slide, so we moved the snow from the slide and let Collin take a ride, which was much faster than normal because of the slippery snow.

The snow didn't stop until Sunday, leaving us with over a foot of the white fluffy stuff, which still seems to be sticking around. I can't say that I'm upset about it sticking though, it sure puts me in a warm and cozy mood, ready to celebrate all of the good things in life, as well as the new and exciting things that are just around the corner for us.

Soft and Cuddly

As we anticipate the new baby I've been trying to find ways to prepare for him so that the pieces of his room mean something and eventually wind up as keepsakes from his childhood. I've decided both to make an afghan and a quilt, with the afghan taking priority, so as one of the many many projects I've been working on, here's what I've been up to. You can get a sense of the colors in Baby Hollman's room by the squares. There are a total of 156 small squares and there will be 25 larger squares, each larger square being the equivalent of four smaller squares.

I didn't learn to crochet until last Christmas, but I'm so glad I did, as I like it much more than knitting and I feel like I can create about a million different stitches. Granny squares are one of the easiest and most well recognized crochet patterns, and I just love their sentimental feel. Although, I didn't want a granny square afghan that was what most people envision, the traditional black centered squares put together in a boring box pattern, instead I used this afghan as my inspiration and picked vibrant colors that will compliment the baby's room.

I can't wait until it comes together, I'm about half way there, and just beginning the larger squares. Before we know it we'll be able to wrap baby Hollman up in the warm, soft cuddly creation and welcome him home to the brisk cool air of Minnesota :)

30 weeks

30 weeks already! I can barely believe it. I remember being so ready at 30 weeks for Collin to arrive, anxious, anticipating, just day dreaming about holding a little tiny baby boy, and now, here I am again, at 30 weeks and our lives reflect somewhat of a different pace- a bit more frantic, still excited, but always, always, always a few steps behind of where we should be :)

Sometimes I feel I've slighted the new baby by not blogging about him as much as I did with Collin. I think at this point in the pregnancy I had post after post chronicling my ailments, his kicks and somersaults, and all other baby related happenings. While its true I haven't blogged about much of this for the new baby, its not that those things aren't being noticed or even admired, instead, its just about focusing on our time where it means the most, and right now that's with Drew and Collin, rather than sitting with a computer in hand blogging away.

The new baby (who does have a name by the way, that some of you know and some of you don't) who is 10 short weeks from making his appearance in this world seems to take all of my hustle and bustle in stride. At 30 weeks he's made a habit of kicking me, much harder than Collin ever did, usually while at work or late at night to let me know he's paying attention. During the day he tends to push up up up and out out out. I feel as though he has both legs and arms wedged between by ribs and is pushing with all his might to get out, its a constant case of pressure against by belly- almost as though if he didn't know better (which maybe he doesn't), he'd try to escape through my belly button.

He also likes to push up on my esophagus, making my heartburn incredibly bad. Just the other night I was pretty confident he had pushed stomach acid up into my throat. It was like a cup of sulfuric acid was running down my throat. Gross, I know. I mentioned this to our midwife at the latest visit and she prescribed me some Prilosec, which has turned out to be my new best friend. That purple pill has made the heart burn disappear and my appetite and taste buds return to normal! Hooray.
As with all old wives tales, I've heard many a story of how much hair this baby will have related to my heartburn. This is probably true, because Collin was born with a fuzzy head of dark brown hair, but I attribute the heartburn to the science of my mis-positioned stomach and esophagus, rather than a hairy-headed kiddo :)
Surprisingly (and thankfully), the back pain related to this pregnancy has decreased over time. So either, I'm better at carrying the weight, my body learned to adjust, or the new baby just doesn't wreak as much havoc has Collin did on my spine and lower back.
Although, the new baby has presented a whole new set of ailments related to this pregnancy that I didn't have with Collin, most specifically carpal tunnel. I've never had carpal tunnel, so this was an unwelcome surprise for me, as I type everyday (as I'm doing now to update the blog) at work and home and I'm also crocheting the new baby's baby blanket, and as you can probably guess, crocheting with a tremendous amount of pain in my wrist makes for less than productive sessions. So, I just grin and bear it, and pursue the end of the tunnel with a finished blanket in my sights.

This baby has also presented me with my first ever case of spider veins. Now I probably shouldn't complain, because the tiny little patch I have of them on my leg is about 2 cm by 1 inch, but still, they made me cringe a bit. Apparently in pregnancy the increase in blood circulation causes these tiny little spider like veins to appear (which by the way, shouldn't be confused with varicose veins, a much larger cousin), and hopefully (according to my midwife) they'll likely disapear after I have the baby, but still, they make me a bit unsettled. Oh, the troubles women put their bodies through to have babies!

The new baby is also making a much larger impact on my life, from noticing how hard it is to put Collin in his crib for naps (I can barely reach all the way over the bar to get him to the mattress)- pretty soon I'll have to resort to dropping him in the crib!, to trying to tie my shoes and shave my legs (a bit difficult), to gasping for breath every time I reach the top of the stairs (thank you very much little baby!) we are all aware he's a big part of our lives, and is slowing me down, bit by bit, in preparation for all the attention he'll need when he's born.
We've also started putting the nursery together, which is one of my favorite parts of getting ready for the baby. The crib, changing table and mural are all up in his room and Collin has taken a particular interest in checking things out. He likes to move his stool to the baby's room and stare out the window and often asks to go in the baby's crib. I think he likes this because the mattress is quite a bit higher than his and he thinks its a sort of jungle gym. I'm looking forward to finishing the nursery, making the curtains, and taking on my newest project, making a baby quilt to go in his room. Its likely the quilt won't be finished before the baby is born, but I still look forward to working on it.

In the meantime we're trying to get Collin ready for the new baby, and he seems to be enjoying it. If you ask him where baby XXXX is, he points to my belly and he's practicing saying his name. He's also in a super loving phase where he kisses and hugs everything, which is so adorable to see as he kisses and hugs all of the new baby's toys.

We're anxious for the new baby, and getting closer and closer to being ready! In 10 short weeks we'll be able to share our newest addition, and finally ready to relax a bit into the first few months of parenting.