Tres Meses

Dear Sweet Owen-
Its been 100 days now since you were born. 100 days ago you woke me up in the middle of the night, the wee hour of 3 am to share that you were ready to meet this world. Throughout my entire pregnancy you were on your own schedule, with fierce independence, determining when you'd arrive (20 days early!), how you'd present (you were breech for about 2 days until you flipped) and who you'd greet- mommy and daddy, but barely daddy as he battled a stomach virus.

Your independence came early in life, taking your own path, and I think in getting to know you, that you'll continue to make your own way.I'm continually amazed with your strength, you kick your little legs out and support your body as though you are going to take off walking tomorrow. You love to stand up, nestled in the crutch of my hands, and there you are, alert and standing tall, taking in the world, as though each color, sound, and smell is building the scene of an amazing adventure. Your eyes widen and connect with new objects and faces, taking in each piece of information like its meant to be savored. You stare, bewildered and amazed all at the same time. Its truly amazing to watch.
Three days into your fourth month and you're rolling over, a feat that you seemed to have accidentally perfected, but somehow has connected you to knowledge of your feet and legs, as you kick toward the world, like a little fish heading out into a wide and deep ocean. Its no surprise to me that you're ready to move, as you continually watch Collin as though inside you are desperately trying to play along, but just can't find the words. All in due time, little Owen. Before we know it you'll be crawling, and my heart will be aching because you'll again have escaped my hold on your infancy.
You love to talk, to chatter and respond, a graceful conversation between the world around you and your own idea about life. Sometimes you are incredibly animated and we can get you to chatter for nearly 10 minutes at a time. To your mother's ears its like a love letter. I adore your conversation.

Your expressions are plentiful, with as many faces as diapers in a day. Your most beautiful expression is your smile, your delicate sweet smile. Every time I see you smile my heart nearly bursts with love. Its as though that little face is saying, momma, this is right where I want to be. I inhale those moments, breathing deeply, trying to savor and be present in every smallest joy you share.


Its true that I don't know how we've gotten this far in life without you. Now here you are, a pivotal part of our collective happiness. Sigh. This is what love is. Really.

Your days are much more manageable now, as at about 3 month you've settled into a schedule- you still sleep quite a bit, but its predictable at least, making our entire family more rested and pleasant. You go to bed at 7 pm and sleep until about 4:30/5 am, and you nap, nap nap, every 1.5 hours that you are awake leads to a nap throughout the day, working out to be about 4 naps. You're sleeping in your crib now, which is fantastic and horrible all at the same time. You're such an easy baby that it was fairly easy to transition you to the crib, but I was a bit heart broken that you aren't in our room anymore, I don't know that I was ready for you to be far away in your own room, but off you go, into the growing world around you, starting within the window of space of your crib.

When you greet the day you nearly always stretch out those adorable arms, high above your head, pushing and pulling the invisible ropes that lead up, out and over, into my arms. You smile, happy to see me, as if to say, well, hello mama! As though it is a surprise I've returned. Once you are awake, taking in the sunshine of the day, you greet your brother and we start the organized chaos that is our morning, from Collin's time on the potty, to tummy time for you, breakfast, nursing, diapers, diapers, diapers, playing, reading books, singing songs, cuddling and napping. Its a busy world for you, but every seam is bursting with love as Collin adores you, and dotes on you throughout the morning, and I use those moments to squeeze every last cuddle out of you before I head off to work.

Sigh,...work. Its true that just this week I started back to work, and while I miss you terribly while I am away, you are in good hands with your new nanny Lindsey. It makes it a bit less awful knowing that you are sleeping much of the time, and I'm not missing out on those moments as you are nestled in your crib, dreaming of the colors, sights and smells of your world.

During the afternoon you roll and play, work on sitting up and generally make everyone around you smile with your contagious happiness. You are really such an easy going and tender baby. We're incredibly blessed. By two pm or so, daddy arrives, ready to explore the world with two baby boys at his side, when you awake from your nap you usually get to join in on the fun, eating a bottle and getting to know the nuances of your dear daddy's routines.



At 4:30 or so, I make my way home, anxious to hold you as if to squeeze out every moment I've missed throughout the day. You're happy and content to observe the world from the cozy cuddle under my chin, buried against my skin. You coo, ahh and babble, sharing the story of your day and I take each and every sound in, precious pieces of conversation.

We spend the evening together happy and thankful that even in the witching hour for most babies, you are happy and content. By 7 pm you are sleepy, ready for the quiet comfort of your crib, leaving me, nearly everyday, to wonder how the day has gone by so quickly, and how you are growing up before my very eyes as I will you to slow down.

At three months you have a budding personality, you love to cuddle and watch the world from the safety of my arms, you're adorably alert and love playing with your brother. You've finally had your first taste of outside for longer than a trip to the car and you seem to really enjoy the sunshine.I day dream about spending our summer playing outdoors, enjoying a beautiful Minnesota morning.

As days continue to fly by I try to hold on to each little moment. There doesn't feel like there is enough time in the day to capture every tiny important change in your life-- but I try, incredibly hard, to pay attention to all of your accomplishments. We're on our way to 4 months and before I know it I'll be right back here on the blog, posting about all of your accomplishments.

Until then, I'm holding on to today....
So please, Owen, grow a little bit slower, take your time and enjoy the journey, it only happens once, and we're trying, desperately, to hang on to each little moment.

Love,
Mama and Daddy