Monster Trucks!

Sometimes we win at parenting. Sometimes things are all success, and barely any disappointment. Sometimes we feel nothing but joy and thankfulness in the gifts we were given as small, malleable humans. This was not that day. Or month for that matter. This was something different.

When you have a baby things change. We were totally expecting this change, but our two boys not so much. They adore Eden and really really can't get enough of her. But for a little while there I'm pretty sure they didn't adore us. We were short on tempers, over-tired, working to find our new balance. We were not at our best, to say the least. I'm sure they wondered when they'd get their parents back. I'm sure the were trying to predict just what would be our trigger each day. We were not winning.

When you recognize you aren't doing your best, its hard to find the way back. Usually because not doing our best is a function of some stress, and until that is relieved finding our way back is like wandering in the dark. But, this time it was a baby, not some thing that would wander away and out of our world. So we had to figure out to make our lives balanced again.

As we figured out our lives with Eden, we knew we also had to figure out how to give the boys the attention they deserved again. We were fortunate they were patient with us, and after many weeks of tolerating the adjustments in our lives, we thought they were due for something fun.

Enter: Monster Jam.

It was early December and I noticed Monster Jam would be in town. Just after Thanksgiving I bought Drew and the boys tickets and sent them off. Drew didn't tell them where they were headed, they thought they were off to take an afternoon ride on the light rail. When they came to the USBank stadium Drew told them where they were headed, and they, of course, were overjoyed. 

He texted me photos, and their faces showed pure joy. I love that look on them. So innocent and lovely. I was so happy to see them happy. They enjoyed every moment of it and told me all about the various monster trucks when they returned. 

 And while I can't say that Monster Jam was what set us back on balance, it certainly was a start. I felt like less of a jerk and they could see the light in our lives again as we find the cadence that is our family's happiness. And so, little by little we eeked our way back to the homeostatis of life.